We Get It!

Why Death and Each Others' Grief Is Unique....

We only know what it feels like, because we have gone through it. It is not easy, but it makes us stronger.

As teens going through grief, we may or may not understand what death is, or why our loved ones passed away.  I completely understand.  As I've said before, I lost my mom when I was 12! No one had ever explained death and loss to me.  I never knew what the word grief even meant to begin with, until a family member sat me down and explained it to me.  When I first learned what it was, I totally did not understand at all.  Some of you may not either, but as I have explained before, grief is the process everyone experiences after a loved one passes away.
There are also many, many causes of death. Just to list a few:
1. Cancer
2. Car Accident
3. Homicide or Suicide
4. Illness
5. Elderly Age
6. Child Birth
And many more.....

Most of us have different experiences, and it is hard to relate to others when our circumstances are different.  We may be talking to someone who has gone through loss, and their loved one may have died from a car accident, while we lost our loved one due to illness.  One may be long term, and one may be very short term, and possibly unexpected.  Although, no matter what, everyone feels the same pain (grief).  A family member of mine passed away from Alzheimer's, and I lost my great-grandmother due to another illness.   I lost two people we cared about and loved.

Another thing we may think or say is, "Well, no one understands what I'm going through!"  This is true sometimes.  Everyone has lost someone in their lives before, but it may have been a long time, so they still have grief, but it has subsided. Other times, some people have not gone through loss personally, then in that situation, they indeed do not understand. Grief is something that includes pain that is indescribable.

Sometimes we may want to explain our pain to someone or something, but can't find any words to explain it.  An easy way I find is to say, "I am in pain." Then, usually, the person I am talking to understands that I am indeed talking about my grief.

Age can also effect our grief.  If we lost our loved ones at the age on one year old, then it isn't so difficult, because chances are we didn't know the passed away loved one so well, being that we were only one year old.  However if we were ten years old or a teenager, we would know the person better, and the loss would be harder, because we would have memories with that person over a span of a number of years. Then if we are thirty or fifty years old, it may be even more difficult, because if it is a parent, a grandparent, a friend, or another family member, we may have even more memories of that person, and the relationship(s) may be more developed, making the grief stronger.  It all depends.

No matter what, grief hurts!  Whether you are two years old or sixty-five years old, the pain is all similar.  Grief isn't easy, and it is hard to get on ourselves for feeling so sad, but it is all expected.  Don't worry, there is nothing wrong with you.  You are all unique in your own ways, while still trying to figure out your own ways of dealing with the grief that comes with our losses.

Do you ever feel alone?  Leave your response in the comment section! Let me know.

Thanks so much for reading!
As Always,
Elizabeth

Here is an interesting site to check out!
http://www.tpronline.org/article.cfm/Teens__Grief


Picture Above From:
http://mothergrievinglossofchild.blogspot.com/